:: Entertainment ::

A song which I loved most & represent my feelings all these while... Enjoy~

Unmei nante kotobade wa katazuke rarenai yo...

Time passes by real fast, it is another weekend now. I was sitting in my room, still doing nothing, kinda panic yet I still managed to finished a japanese drama series. It was based on a true story(not something created by people) which was REALLY touching. It was a series called "Ichi Rittoru no Namida" (1 Litre of Tears). All of my friends cried for every episode when they watched it; Me, who was kinda cold-blooded, there were few episodes which tears running in my eyes (aka eyes-wet-wet, LOL~) but did not really cry. Series which can makes me feel so could be consider as a very very touching & cry-able story it have. Highly recommended~! & those who are close to me, you all are damn lucky, I would not delete it yet because it was nice & I know you all would wanna watch it (SEE~! Where can you find this kinda friend? LOL~)

I did not cry while watching this series not because I do not think it was not touching enough, it is just because there is always somebody who gave the girl some great & meaningful advice & I find it more meaningful to smile when they can view 'Life' so positively. The girl was tough, she was really tough. Me too, will wonder:"What would I do if I were her?" Am I as tough as she was or till the state where could face the problem like she did? She was like every human in the world, when there's bad thing happens upon us, we will think:"Why is it me? Why?" She asked the doctor when she found out about her disease:"Can I ask another question? Disease... The disease... Why does it chosen me?"

"Byoki wa doushite watashi o erandano darou?

Unmei nante kotobade wa katazuke rarenai yo..."

Thought of many things while watching this series... What is "Love" & what is "Like"; what is "sympathy" & what is "resposibility"... Would someone confuse about love & like for someone? Would anyone be with another person because of sympathy or resposibility? Would sympathy become love? Would resposibility be the motivation to love & not to love?

To love, is to have a deep & intense feeling towards a person, the desire & atrraction towards a person, with whom one is disposed to make a pair. When you love someone, you can do anything for that person & yes, love is blind. Love makes you lost of your normal thinking ability, makes you confuse, makes you wanna own that person & to be just own by you, & yes, it makes you & him/her become A pair, not more than that. You can only love with one kind of feeling towards one person: to love your dad as your father, to love your mom as your mother, to love you gf/bf as your lover, to love your friend as a friend, etc. Love is different from like, cause you can do anything for "Love", not for "Like". It is easy to give up something you like, but not something you love.

No matter what kind of situation is there, "Like", "Sympathy" or "Responsibility", it should not be reckon as your love to someone. That is why I always said, do not love someone because of some reasons, it is dangerous. You might found someone who you really love someday, & hurt the one you are sympathy of; you might found that responsibility is something that is dragging you & not true love, hurt yourself as well as another party; you might found that you just "like" that person & not "love" that person because you could not give as much as you could or she/he wants... Many possibility, anything is possible in this world, as long as you want it to be possible. You can claimed your so-called "Love" to someone, but please bare in mind that you would not hurt that person in the end. Thus, love, when you DO love, tell them you DO, prove to them. Do not tell when you love but you could not give them anything & hurting will be the result.

Yes, love is the greatest power in this world. It helps to conquer everything & it could brings you to hell too. It is not everything, but it is important. To be love, gives you strength to survive; to lost love, you might lost hope, lost your soul, & some even give up their lives for love (no matter which kind of love it is: family, friends, bgf; depends on how deep you have your love for them) Yet, it depends on individuals. Every person is different, from their character, their background, their thinking, etc. You may think losing love is no big deal, but it might not be the same to someone who are so different from you, cause it might means everything to them. So, LOVE someone when you mean it & do PROVE it. Since you have chose to hold his/her hand, then do not let got so easily. When you know you will let go someday, do not try to hold it --> "Nice to see, nice to hold; Once broken, considered sold." LOL~ Seriously, yes, once broken, it is not easy to be mend.

Anyway, will share more when I some new thoughts about it again. Anyone who wanna watch it can ask from me or video stream it at Youtube.com cause I am not sure that where it could be download. Enjoy the series & I do hope you guys can share your opinions about this series & those thoughts with me here. Today, I will share the theme song from this drama with you guys, nice song & very suitable for the mood of the drama. Until then, CHEERS~

K - "Only Human"

P/S: Can anyone help me to find the OST of this drama? Like it a lot... Thanks in advance~ Muaks~

:: Crap of the Day ::

Did not went to class today, reason-less... Woke up late, sitting in the room for the whole day, doing nothing. One of my friend asked me not to stop blogging, but it is obvious that my posts are getting lesser lately. I do not know what to blog about & I do not have the mood to blog either. Mind is full of junks & it is hard to clear it off. Life is tough & it is hard to move on now. I wonder how far can a person's emotional state being carry to?

There are times people said, life can be good if you want it to be good. I doubt it. I bet none of you all have never seen those photos of those African kids, those people who died because of starvation, those people died because of war, those homeless people, & more. Come to think about that, don't they wish life can be good? Don't they wanted to think that life is something good? But why are they the one who should be suffering? What makes them different from us that makes them the one to deserve those kind of life? How far can their wish of a better future helps carry them to move on? Is that life can be good if you want it to be good?

Yes, we are lucky, & we are far damn lucky than they are. That is why we should not waste our life & we must treasure this gift from God. Is that so? Still, I doubt it. What makes us different from them to deserve this priority? To have the priority to WANT life to be good & it CAN be good? We are all the same, we are all ordinary people, we are humans, are we not? What is there that makes the difference? Are we superior than they are? If you said yes, then go & check yourself out in front of a mirror. What is that you yourself have that makes you better than they are & please, do not tell me you have $, car or any crap, that is not yours, that is what your parent gave you. Good-looking? Crappiest~ It meant nothing to this world. It is LIFE. You are born to have a great life, but they don't.

Come to think about us now. Still, we are all ordinary people & we are all humans (unless you wanna tell me that you are not, =.=") There are people among us that can make you sad, make you pissed, make you cry, make you feel that you are something worthless. They scold you, humiliate you, make fun of you, take your feelings for granted, & they think they are right. So, who are you that you can do those to others? Who are you to do those to people & just tell them you are sorry & that's it? What makes your "SORRY" so powerful to run away from all those faults? Come on, affect people's emotions? "I'm sorry~!" & that's it? Sorry means nothing. Especially by those who can says sorry without really feeling sorry.

It is always hard to say you are sorry because when you feel sorry & you mean it, it means that you did something really wrong. It takes courage to apologize. Ever come across that you wanted to apologize to you family or best friends, you took a deep breath & you speak, but not a word that came out from your mouth? That is how apologizing should feel. It is not easy to do so & it is not easy to said so. To say sorry is just like telling someone you love them, they must be somebody who means a lot to you. It is not a word that you can just say it but do not mean it.

Anyway, enough of serious thought. =.=" Tired ne, wrote so long about what I thought today... >.<" So, let's enjoy something new (I guess it was new... =.=") by the two chinese boys from Taiwan, not VERY funny, but it's kinda cute... Enjoy ya... Until then, CHEERS MATES~

:: Crap of the Day ::

I did not blog for a few days, yet I did not show a very productive results in my assignments, sigh~! So, what have I done for these few days? Let me see... I have finished watching 7-8 of Stephen Chou movies, chating & gaming with friends, sleep (a lot), day-dreaming (most of the time) & listening to songs (my fav past time activity) >.< & I ended up panic-ing every night thinking of how many days are left for my assignments & exam preparation (though it seems kinda near to my Europe trip & my return to Malaysia, LOL~)

Anyway, really DID chat a lot these few days. Seems like my friends around me were facing different problems & I have been giving consultation FOC for them, that's what friends are for I guess? LOL~ But I was stucked in mine. I gave them opinions & I am the one who end up do not understand the philosophies which in fact applies well to my own situation. Am I dumb or what? I quote from a blog I read: "...sometimes some things that may not matter much to you but it might means the world to another..."; that is the reason I can give my views to my friends because I am not the actual person who feels it, who engage in that situation. I do not know how hard it is for them & yet, vice versa. I wish I could share my problems like they do, ^_^ but too bad, you all know me well...

"To handle yourself, use your head; To handle others, use your heart."

Same quote: "...sometimes some things that may not matter much to you but it might means the world to another..."; that is part of what I was wondering all these while. When you see something as very important to you, means a lot to you, it might means nothing to others too. Therefore, you can give a million reasons to show how important or how much it means to you, but you can never convince others of seeing it the same way. So, never blame others for not understanding of how you feel because they are not YOU. You understand well, so solve the problem yourself. Never ask others to drop the topic when you are the one who started it. Never feel angry because others' opinions are not those you want to listen; because you know hell well of the answers you want. (Oh~ what the crap am I talking about... =.=")

Anyway, I receive a forward mail with a kinda meaningful poem in it (but hate those chain letters people sent to me) So sorry folks, I don't meant to forward those stuffs to you all, but it WAS a meaningful poem. It was about how we always bring our work to another day, delaying, dragging... We always said,"Tomorrow will be..."

"But tomorrow comes & tomorrow goes,

& distance between us grows & grows...

Another corner yet miles away,

Here's a telegram sir, Jim died today..."

I modified it with, "Around the corner yet miles away, what happens if I die today?" The situation was, no matter which party who "go" first, why is it have to be tomorrow? What if tomorrow never comes?

"And that's what we get and deserve in the end.

Around the corner, a vanished friend..."

"Remember to always say what you mean. If you love someone, tell them. Don't be afraid to express yourself. Reach out and tell someone what they mean to you. Because when you decide that it is the right time it might be too late. Seize the day. Never have regrets. And most importantly, stay close to your friends and family, for they have helped make you the person that you are today. " -----> This was the email I received & I agreed that no matter what situation was it, always say what you mean. Never wait for tomorrow~! (unless it IS meant to be done only on TOMORROW =.=") If you do not know how to tell directly, find a way to express yourself. It costs you nothing, but you might gain a lot in return. ^_^

Enough for the "Crap of the day". Today's dessert will be Justin's mtv, "I deserve it". Another nice song with a nice opening. Enjoy~ I shall die hard on my assignments now, CHEERS~ ^_^

"Hate myself for loving you so much...

Oh I hate myself for falling back in love...

Never been good at words I wanna say, I sing my love for you...

I'll just let the music make sweet love to you..."

Move along~

Decided to blog earlier because my sadness doubles-up today... I actually gotta go school to help celebrate my tutor, Alan's birthday. But end up I stayed at home & have some rest because my headache strikes again, sigh~ Working my mind too much really ain't a good thing, everytime I did so i'll get a headache. Really do not know when my mind will stop working, maybe the time when my heart stops beating I suppose?

Had been discussing about these thinking stuffs with my friend yesterday. Girls do a lot of thinking job & most of the time are all negative thoughts. Is it true? I do not know. I just THINK a lot, in fact I think more than they did I guess; good stuffs, bad stuffs, postive, negative, neutral, past, present, future... Ooo... Whole bunch to think about but never thought about assignments idea, LOL~ Sigh~! That is life, we need to think, to understand, to be independant, to solve problem by ourselves.

I really do not know how to express myself at this stage, things have became more complicated I guess. Miss my best friend who did not online for long, need consultation right now, sigh~! Anyway, I guess all I need to do now is to concentrate on my work, as I can never make everyone happy, I can never make everyone satisfied, I am just a normal human that have own feelings & emotions. I am not saint that can help everyone &amp; make everyone happy; will never act as one because that is stupid to think of yourself as great as so. Want to make people happy? I might make people sad in the end; Want to satisfied others? I might be the one who are useless that I could not even satisfy myself. Live your own life, do not bother so much. Who are you to care so much, correct? Who are you?

What I can just say to everyone at this very moment is, "& even when your hope is gone, move along, move along just to make it through...When everything is wrong, we move along..." Until then, I miss you all my dear friends, those who I always keep in contact & keep in mind, do remember I miss you all~ Love you all~

P/S: My return date & time has already being confirmed, & I got the date I wanted, thank God~! Cheers~ ^_^

End of my beddings changing in Liverpool >.<

Another wednesday had passed, my weekend starts again, & assignment rushing weekend continues. >.<" Still have 3 assignments, 1 project & 1 exam to go... & its going get tough... Anyway, it was something that I was really worried about right now because the tutors kept on reminding us how important the last 3 assignments are, how many words the project should be, & how tough the exam will be. :: STRESS :: AZA-AZA FIGHTING~!!!

I was busying with my assignments while at the same time I need to settle my trip's stuffs & also the changing of my flight's return date. Hard to decide, many things I have to figure out before really send out the email to the travel agency. But still, I need to decide soon because afraid that there will be no seats for the date I choose to go back, it is the peak season by the way. Have sent out the email, hopefully will get the return date I want. :: FINGERS CROSSED ::

As I had mentioned before, every wednesday will be the day for the students to change their beddings (if you want to). I change my beddings two weeks once & when I went down with Gie today for new beddings, she reminded me that this will be our last time changing our beddings. WOW~ Time flies... I have been changing it for almost 5 times since then & now it is going to stop. Ya, today was my last time to change my beddings. Kinda sad though...

While I was showering, I thought of the same thing. I actually need to throw rubbish for 4 times during my stay over here & I had thrown for 3 times. The 4th time will be the very last week of my stay in Marybone, Liverpool. I had to wash my clothes for at least once a week & my washing powder was getting lesser. I almost finish all my instant noodles I brought, my vitamins, my milos, my shampoo, my body shampoo... Oh ya... I am going to finish my course soon...

Am I sad? Ya, kinda. I will miss this room of mine (Phase 1, 72B); I will miss the weather here; I will miss the British accent I heard; I will miss the times I went shop for the cheapest food... >.<" Ya... I am going to miss this place... ^_^

Anyway, life goes on... ^_^ I am going back home soon, real soon... Everything was settled~! Yet, my emotions? Still in the confuse state. Do enjoy Janice's mtv, with the song "Confused & Disturbed". Nice song~ Until then, do miss me my friends~ Cheers~ :: Confuse ::

& I wonder...

I passed up my assignment today, but I did not have the happy feeling like I had for the previous assignments being passed up. Yes, my confuse state was still bothering me. Anyway, there was something that makes me really happy, yet sad today ---> I have copied another bunch of Stephen Chou's movies to my laptop, LOL~ but I do not have enough space for other english movies. >.<" DAMN~! I should have bought an external harddisk & now I was so regret that I did not buy it during PC fair that time, ish~! Shouldn't waste time working, >.<" Should have a better "preparation" for coming over here, LOL~

There is a person I know who likes Stephen Chou's movies a lot & own some of it. Therefore, this collection of the movies makes me happy because I know that person will like it a lot & will be happy to see it, HAPPIE~~ ^_^ If possible, will wish to watch it together when I'm back to Malaysia, YEAH~ ^_^ Wish me luck~!! Still wondering how would it be when I am back to Malaysia... Would I see the person I wanna see? & who will pick me up? Will I have to go home myself? >.<" Hopefully not~! Hope everything will be as fine as how I wish it would be, ^_^ & also, wish that my confuse state will be cleared soon~

Not much to blog about, so I shall end it here today, ^_^ Enjoy the MTV, though its Full House MTV again, but I like the song. Relaxing song, makes me feel better, & the song's rhythm can represents my feeling well (especially the time when I was wondering about my return to Malaysia & happy stuffs that are going to happen ---> hopefully~) :: Fingers Crossed ::

Until then, do take care my dear friends~ Adios~

Moodless - Confuse

Just finish my assignment, knew it would not be a good one, sigh! Anyway, my bad, wasting too much time lately. =.=" Really do not have the mood to do assignment, even now I have finish my assignment, I do not have the mood to sleep, do not know why... Or maybe I DO know why... Just that I really do not want to think about it... Still have 3 weeks to go... Time flies, yes it does... Sigh... Do not know what I want to say... Maybe this song can represents my emotional state right now... Enjoy the song, it was nice. ^_^ Cheers mate~

:: confuse state ::

:: Entertainment ::

I found this video when I was looking around in Youtube for mtvs (though I should be very busy doing my assignment =.=") It was a video of four Korean idols imitating Michael Jackson & they all dance very well, RESPECT~ I love Rain (Bi) especially; he was dancing "Thriller" part, he was great~! "Dangerous" was another part that I like, though I do not know who was dancing that part, but he was good. ^_^ Do enjoy the video while I shall start my work which I should have started it N years ago, >.<"

Guys who dance well are ATTRACTIVE~ (too... LOL~)

AZA AZA FIGHTING~!!!

P/S: I like the ending part which four of them dancing on the "Billie Jean" song, especially the dance step which I named it "One-Leg-Kicking", LOL~ (Ya'll will know which part was that, no worries...) ---> if really do not know, then ask me, LOL~

:: Scotland Trip - Finale ::

Here comes another weekend~ This is week 10 going on week 11~ Time flies, it really does. ^_^ Anyway, will blog about my feelings in my coming post. Now, I shall continue my 'essay' - "A picture says a thousand words" Finale. It is the summary of the whole Scotland trip.

As we departed late on the first day, therefore we headed directly to Glasgow & by the time we reached was already midnight, did not took any photos on that. The second day, our destination were...

Tomatin Scottish Whisky Distillery - Famous Scotch Single Malt Whiskey

Loch Ness

That night, we stayed at Inverness. The third day, we went to...

John O'Groats

Ullapool

Due to certain reasons, some of us headed back to Inverness while some stayed at Ullapool that night. Sadly, an incident happened which really pissed me off that night, but I will only mentioned about it in my coming post if possible. Anyway, that night was the first in my lifetime being a backpacker. >.<" I have to sleep on the floor inside the common room of the hostel with sleeping bag. Interesting experience though.

Pity look, LOL~ (Daniel behind) =.="

I was pissed, yet I smile~! >.<

The common room

The next morning *YAWN* Just woke up...

Our last destination - Edinburgh

We headed back to Liverpool around 10pm on Sunday, & we reach Marybone (my hostel) around 4 something to 5 in the morning. >.<" I was damn tired & damn sleepy. Throughout this trip, I realised that Marybone was such a wonderful place to stay. I miss my room & I miss my bed. Anyway, I am glad that everyone reached safely. ^_^

Last but not least...

:

:

:

:

:

:

:

:

:

:

We kena a saman over here just before we wanna return the car~! LOL~ Never imagine we would get a penalty even when we are now in Liverpool. A saman~!!! LOL~~ Something memorable for this trip I guess?

Liverpool, UK's saman >.<"

End of the story, LOL~ Nice ending isn't is? Anyway, personally I have more stories on it after this trip - "after-trip story", but would not share it here. Be patient my fellow friends, still left a month to go & ya'll can ask anything you want about my life in Liverpool. Started to miss Liverpool now, especially Marybone --> my room, my bed. ^_^ But still, I miss Malaysia. I just can't wait to be back. Let's have a countdown for me, will ya? Until then, do miss me my friends. Cheers always~ Love ya all~

:: Scotland Trip - Part 3 ::

*YAWN* Having stay up late to chat & do some readings for my assignment (obviously, the latter would not be something very successful, LOL~) Anyway, it is "A picture says a thousand words" part 2, my third essay about my Scotland trip. Again, it is a long 'essay'. Here it goes...

White Shirt Gang - Felice, Jun, Pauline, Daniel, Woan Jiun & Me

A church @ Inverness

A bunch of weird guys in costume @ Edinburgh

Edinburgh Castle

A garden nearby the castle

My first Merry-Go-Round ride in my life @ Edinburgh ^_^ (Louis too, LOL~)

Look at the dogs~!!!!

New car members (Peugeot) - Daniel, Me, Louis, Fei Wen & Suet Ling

Scottish~!!! Man in skirt, LOL~

Day view of Edinburgh city

Group photo - Night view of Edinburgh city

Whew~ it is not easy to write such a long essay, LOL~ Anyway, it is time for me to bath, read, do assignment & wait for my mail (most important ^_^) Stay tune to my blog for more updated news yo~ Cheers~ Muaks~

:: Scotland Trip - Part 2 ::

As my tutor said: "a picture can says a thousand words..." Those below will be my second essay about my trip, LOL~

The main car I backed-up - Vauxhall

My car members: Pauline, Me, Joanne, Jin & Fei Wen

Ba Ba White Sheep ~ ~

Inverness - City Centre

Charlies Cafe - Local Breakfast (Look at the Fish & Chips, yummy~)

John O'Groats - The Tip of Scotland

Nice view of John O'Groats (This is what we called the sea & the sky >.<")

Louis & Me @ John O'Groats ^_^ (Sea breeze oo~)

Louis, Me, Suet Ling & Fei Wen @ Edinburgh

Group photo @ Tomatin - CHEESE~


The Point of Stoer (A place we called as "Tian Ya Hai Jiao", as in the movie starring by Takeshi)

As a conclusion~ NAH~ do you think I will end my 'essay' here? LOL~ OF COURSE NOT~! "A picture can says a thousand words" part 2 will be coming soon... Please tune in to http://fxcked-up.blogspot.com for it. Have to rush assignment again, sigh! Until then, cheers mates~ ^_^

:: Scotland Trip - Part 1 ::

YO MATES~~~ IM BACK~~~ The first thing I am going to say about this trip is ---> I was very very very and extremely tired =.=" I would not say it was a very nice trip, cause shits happened and it is kinda upsetting. But anyway, Scotland was a very very nice place, the scenery was absolutely nice. The sea, castles, bridges... There is only one word to describe ---> "WOW~"

I could hardly blog about the whole trip, because it is indescribable by few words. And the experienced I had during this trip, whew~ out of your imagination. I am sorry that I could not share my story much over here and I will share it with ya'll when I back, is it ok my buddies? Anyway, I will talk about something that makes me happy along the trip.

First, a place called Loch Ness whereby was told about the occurence of a sea monster named "Nessie". It was an enormous lake, great view! And one of the thing that makes me happy about the trip to Loch Ness was, I got some simple yet meaningful souvenirs for important people in my life, hopefully they like it. Anyway, I got one for myself too, LOL~ ^_^

At the same time, there was a thing that makes me sad. My friend had actually accidentally deleted my photos on that two days, SIGH~! I could just share those they took, sorry Sim, maybe you will like those others I took at other places, will show you when I am back. ^_^ Anyway, it was something sad. Like I always said: "Too bad, too sad..."

Second, I experienced my first backpacking for this trip (though we travel by car, LOL~) We booked a place to stay, but eventually we end up sleeping in the sleeping bag. =.=" With a bunch of strangers along, a "global village" i shall said. It was a very very long story about how we end up that way, sorry for could not share it right now, will briefly blog about it one day (you will know why is it not now by then).

Third, I had my first drive in Scotland, UK~! Though I did not drove a lot along this trip, but I did drove. It was nice to drive along the highway with blue blue sky and surrounded by those trees and mountains like those in Malaysia (I can tell you that the sky over here is really really nice, now I know why people said "The moon overseas is far more rounder" >.<") It is not because of the admiration of Western countries, it is just really different over here. I have photos to prove my statement, LOL~

And my dear friends, I actually drove a Peugeot 207 ~~!!! LOL~ The car that I actually told my mom that I will first change my Kelisa to Honda, then Honda to Peugeot, Peugeot to BMW (though ridiculous, but just something fun to dream about ok?) What happened was now I actually had the chance to drive it, and I was in Scotland. DAMN~ IT WAS GREAT~! Could you imagine driving it along the highway, 100km per hour (you can drive faster if you want, but it was kinda dangerous here), great sceneries around... FUIYOO~~~ CUN~~~

Anyway, enough about the trip right now, have to sleep. Have not get enough sleep for these few days, will blog more about it again. Until then, cheers~ Muaks~

Blue Blue Sky... ^_^

Driving to Edinburgh

Peugeot 207

:: Notice ::

Dear mates, I will be going to Scotland for 4 days, so would not be able to blog for these few days. Do miss me when I am not around, LOL~ I will bring back loads of nice photos for you guys. Gotta sleep now, I am one of the back-up driver, so need to get enough rest. ^_^ Until then, CHEERS~ MISS YA'LL~ MUAKS~

Today's entertainment: Bu De Bu Ai (Have to Love) by Wilber Pan ==> originally... =.=" This mv was the synchronization of the same song by two Taiwan boys and they became popular because of that. They are really really funny. Anyway, I like this song, it reminds me of an important day in my life and turning point of my life. Reminds me of an important person too. Do enjoy the song, have a break, get a laugh, back to life~ ^_^

It was FUNNY~ ^_^ Love this song~

1st of August

WOW~ It was a damn cold day, drizzling, strong wind blowing, and my room was like having an air-con in it, freaking cold~ I was lazy to get up this morning, even thought of not going for class since I totally cannot get what the lecturer was saying (his french accent was very very strong >.<") Yet, I got up in the end, headed to class on a gloomy day, with a gloomy look on my face. Did not get enough sleep on weekdays because I always stayed up late for my emails, and sometimes I woke up in between for it, I never do mind about that though, ^_^

My mind works harder on gloomy days, I do not know why. When the weather is cold and gloomy, I started to think a lot; I started to miss old times, miss my friends, miss home, miss those who I seldom see, even if I was in Malaysia. Therefore, I looked for chances to meet them up. I always believe that chance will not always be there for you, you have to seek for chances. Chance could be gone just like that, and it was always useless to wait, wasting time. In my life, I seek for chances in certain aspects, not every aspects, courage to seek is limited though. Yet, I tried on a lot of ways to seek for chances before; it might not guarantee you a return, it might be an outcome that disappoints you a lot, but as long as you tried before, it costs you nothing, agree? On the other hand, you might get what you want in the end, so isn't it worth for a shot?

Life is short, I do hope I can live the best out of it. I do not agree that "the best" would be getting high grades in school, having a high income job, so-called young and successful, driving Merz or stuffs, NAH~ I do not care about those much, partly because I know I do not possess the "will" to work hard and achieve all those, and also because I believe in destiny. In life, there are things that are meant to be yours, and it will be yours in the end; when it is not, it is not. Have you not heard of this song: "Que Sera Sera, whatever will be, will be..."

When I said to live the best out of my life, I guess is to enjoy eating, enjoy hanging out with friends, enjoy being with people you are happy with, enjoy watching movies, enjoy music, enjoy sleeping as well, LOL~ I guess to live the best out of life, is to do whatever you like to do, because there is not much chance to do so. Who knows, life is short, and you would not know how short it could be; you might not have the chance to do those things anymore sooner or later, agree? So what's with the hard-core studies, money, Merz? You might not be able to enjoy what you really want (Or you might just want those or nothing at all, LOL~) But what if you could not achieve those which are so far away from you, and at the same time you are losing the most simple and happiest things that are in front of you? ( please bare in mind that I am not encouraging people to ignore studies, ignore work and stuffs, just at the same time, enjoy those that can brings you happiness)

Life should be spent by doing something you like and you are happy with, why spent living a miserable one? Do try to be happy in life, it is not easy though, because life is tough, but do TRY. Life is tough, mistakes are unavoidable. Never draw yourself back, as life making mistakes is not only more honourable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing at all (only applies to mistakes done UNINTENTIONALLY and WITHOUT BAD INTENTION). ^_^

Anyway, above is purely my own opinion, without the intention to affect any party. Feel free to comment, but please do not crap. ^_^ Waiting for my emails, shall sleep soon. I miss you all my friends, I will be back soon, LOL~ Until then, stay tuned to http://fxcked-up.blogspot.com Adios~

Love guys who played piano, LOL~ I miss my piano too... ^_^

A nice song by Daniel Powter - "Bad Day" (I love this mv~)

5 Weeks To Go ~~~

Just in a blink, it is the ninth week of my course, still got 5 weeks to go, time sure flies. ^_^ I guess just in another blink time, i will be on the plane, flying back to Malaysia again. Like I said before, by the time I have to leave, I guess I will miss this place. Ya, thought of the time when I was on the flight coming over here, WOW~ it was just like something happened yesterday.

Talk about yesterday... Yesterday I went to Cheshireoak again, I have took some photos on the places there (Sim, got nice pics, but not scenery ones, ^_^) , will upload it another time, got some problem with my usb port, sigh! After came back from Cheshireoak, I sat in my room for a chat, then headed to my classmates' house. A new friend I knew on the day I went to Manchester came purposely to make some sushi for all of us, haha... cute person, and the sushi was nice. This guy was kinda different from the guys I knew, because he bakes, he cooks (even sushi), and he was even patient enough to do those DIY stuffs; and he claimed that a lot of Hong Kong girls like him because of so, LOL~ Nice and cute guy. ^_^

Anyway, thought of this long time ago, and I thought of it again today. There are many different kind of people in this world: good people, bad people, straightforward kind, fake kind, mature kind, naive kind, OOO~ any kind... Loads of kinda people in this world. There is once I think this world was great, all those time before I graduated from secondary school. When I started to work part-time, I found that people are different... as in, different from how I perceive this world previously. When I stepped into my college life at KL, there are more that I have seen. Time after time, I realise that:" WOW~ even THESE kinda people exists in this world!" (Ever experienced these kinda feeling before?)

I never said that I am a great person; in fact, I was not great being a child of my parent, I was not great being a sis of my brother, I was not great being a friend, I was not great being a girlfriend, I was not great being a student, I was not great being an employee... Nah~ I was just not that great. I am just an ordinary person who do not harm people, do not want to try to hurt people, do not want to see people having a difficult life so I help when I could. I just want to lead a simple life, as simple as possible, but people I met in my life making it complicated than ever. Have you ever met anyone in your life that is so fake, that when they have done mistakes, they can just say sorry and act like nothing ever happened before? I do made mistakes, I do apologized, but I never could have acted like those never happened before. People are weird in a way, people would wanna lie to the whole world about themselves, and they even could lie to their ownself, making everything seems ok. I could have lie to the world by the matter of fact, but I just could not lie to myself, pardon me, my 'level of power' is still not as great as that, LOL~

People are different, they do things differently, but it was just once in a lifetime to know those weird people and those different kind of people. They gave you a lesson, they helped you to grow up, get real, and then they make you a person that can stay tough, stand still in life. In fact, they actually shows you more about this world, they showed you about yourself. Maybe how good you are being, or how worse you are being, who knows? But as time goes by, I found out that I was naive once, recently, I get to know that I am far naive than I thought I was. Anyway, time to grow up, and I know I did, thank God. ^_^ Luckily I was never stucked being naive, I guess it would be the most stupid thing to do so, break the Guinness record I would, LOL~

Life could be sucks, could be difficult, but I guess it become interesting as I am going home soon. Enough of 'Today's Crap', time to sleep now. Dessert for today ---> The final dance scene in the movie "Honey" starring by Jessica Alba, a song called "Believe". Enjoy~ Until then, *yawn* Good night mates!!! ^_^

Love this movie! Love Jessica Alba~ ^_^